Of accusations...

I am sure everyone experience this at some point in their lives. How should one cope with the frustration of being accused (especially if its done behind your back)? I had a recent experience and coincidentally, 2 friends called me up to share their frustration of being accused of something, asking me for opinion. Not surprisingly, things looked a lot clearly when I was addressing their situation, which led to me realizing how simple it is to deal with these little annoyances.

The most difficult part of it all is dealing with your own emotions. I've came up with the following solution:

Golden Rule 1: Do not do unto others what you do not want others to do unto you. (i.e. don't think of revenge)

Rule 2: Stay positive and don't get affected. This is the hardest but one must rationalize, why let such things affect you. Continue to be yourself and do everything with conscience. Keep up the spirits!

Rule 3: Truth will always prevail. Let others say what they want but truth will always remain, they'll lose their credibility later. Trying to prove innocent immediately would usually be seen as a form of self defence, so why bother?

I recalled a story from Ah Q 正傳 which goes like this:

Ah Q was walking through this very narrow alley. This alley is so narrow that only one person could pass at any time. Halfway through his journey, he saw his arch enemy, Ah Choo (made it name), walking in the opposite direction towards him. Somebody has to give way. Ah Choo said to him, "I will not allow any dogs and beasts to walk pass me". If Ah Q had insisted that he walk first, he'd be accepting the accusation. Of course he wouldn't want to do that, but that would mean he'd have to let Ah Choo pass him. So Ah Q said, "Oh, I'm just the opposite." and offer to let him pass. Obviously, if Ah Choo had continued to walk pass Ah Q, he'd be admitting that he's either a dog or a beast. Hence, he had no choice but to let Ah Q pass and acknowledge that Ah Q isn't a dog or a beast. What comes round goes round.